Why Fishing?

I never thought I'd be a fisherman. Growing up, the sport of fishing was something I viewed as just a notch above barbaric, and at least in some small part, backwards. As an English-major I admired Hemingway for his prose, but not for his obsession for catching Blue Marlins off the coast of Cuba.

I was never a particularly outdoorsy guy, and I just kind of figured I'd end up living in or near New York City, or some other large city. So it's surprising in some small part to even me that I'm so taken with fishing. And there's no single reason why I have started, or why I'm sticking with it so much, but instead a couple:

1. First and foremost, I love being on or near the water. Maybe it's because I grew up near the Chesapeake and the inlets of the Potomac River, but I'm most at peace when I'm near a big body of water. I mourned moving to Pennsylvania as a kid because I was so far away from the beach. I missed my friends, I missed my school, I missed my old house, but just as much I missed the open water. Fishing only carries me so far through that need. I've been talking for a while now how I want a boat. I tell my friends how if I won the lottery, I'd disappear off the Earth by buying a big enough sailboat that I could hop islands in the Caribbean and just disconnect for a while. I'm sure if I lived closer to the water now I'd have already bought myself a boat and I'd be out on the water damn near every weekend. My lawn would be knee-high and I'd be out on the ocean. And I'd be happy.
2. I love learning how to be more self-reliant. I figure if I learn how to go out and fish then I'm just that much more independent. And I figure if I can teach my kids to be independent and self-reliant in the world then I've done right by them. The last thing I'd want to do is raise two otherwise healthy and smart children who were either too frightened or too disgusted to fight for themselves in the woods.
3. I love any hobby where I get to obsess over gear. I just get all geeky and happy when I walk in to a place like Bass Pro and can stroll aisle after aisle of different fishing gear and try to figure out what it all does, and if I can use it. I don't need to even buy it. Just looking makes me feel bliss. This is not something I reasoned out before I started fishing, but it's one reason why I like it now.
4. But most important to me, right now my two kids beg me to take them fishing. They love spending time with me. I know this isn't going to last. At some point I'm going to be a horrible embarrassment to them. At some point, their friends, their school activities, their own lives away from here will take all of their attention and suddenly I'm good for lending them the car and doing their laundry.
   
   So I want to cash in on every moment where I'm still important enough to be with. Taking them fishing, I get to sit in the still and quiet of nature with my two wonderful children, and just, be with them. There's no need to yell, or scold, or even talk if we don't want to. We can just sit and drown bait all day.
   
   
   

Yesterday, after four hours of sitting on some rocks by the Conewago Creek in the mid-October sun and feeling happily baked, my son turned to me and said "Daddy, make sure we mark this place on the map. I want to come back here again with you. Even if we don't fish, I just want to come back here with you." I know some parents who'd give their eye teeth to be that in demand from their kids. The happiness from that moment warmed me more deeply than that beautiful autumn sun. And, you can bet every dollar you have that the minute I got in the car I marked it on the map, and I will make sure I get back there with my kids.

The fishing itself, that's all secondary. I wouldn't care if I caught nothing but boots and twigs for the rest of my life so long as I also get to catch moments like that with my kids too.

Fitness Journal - 22 May 2009

I stepped out into the 3pm heat. The sun dropped over my head and my shoulders burned under my navy t-shirt. The kids ran around outside shooting each other with water guns. Trucks of tanbark rumbled by. I sat on the front stoop and quietly laced my sneakers.

I started my warm up walk around the cul de sac, stretching my calves, walking on the balls of my feet, and slowly taking lunges.

"Daddy, can we squirt you?"
"Not yet. I have my cellphone and my stop watch with me."
"Aw man..."
"Tell you what. Jog with me and you can squirt me when we're done."
"Really?"
"Really!"

They stopped and talked while I turned the corner and got to the starting line.
"Daddy, wait, we're coming with you!"
"Okay then, come on."

And we were off.

Up the street into the next cul de sac and around the curve.
"Are we ready to stop yet?" McKenna asked.
"Not yet."
"Well how long?" she huffed.
"Keep going."
We turned the corner and down the hill we ran, still keeping the slow small strides. The air was warm and my breath was a little ragged. McKenna asked again "Are we ready to stop yet?"
"Not yet."
She started to fuss but I just kept running. Owen skittered quietly about in front of me, almost making me trip twice but keeping pace.

All the way down the hill we ran. All the way down the hill McKenna fussed. I looked back at her. "If you didn't fuss, you could keep up!"
"I don't want to keep up!"
"I'm not stopping!" I was trying to beat my 15:00 minute mile. I was going to beat my 15:00 minute mile.

I turned the next corner and walked up the hill. Owen kept urging his sister on. I checked my time. Only 7 minutes elapsed so far. I could make it before 15 minutes, but I had to press on.

I caught my breath as I walked. McKenna asked "Do we have any water?"
"No"
"Can we call mommy?"
"We're almost home now. Let's keep going."

Along the rolling hills we ran towards our house. I could feel the energy in my legs giving out. My sides itched and my lungs were empty. I stopped and walked and heard a honking horn. Heather had driven by to pick up the kids. I let her shuffle them into the van while I kept going. So close to home and the stop watch showed 12:30. I was going to beat my best time!

I turned the corner to begin the hill climb up to my house and I started to sprint. 13:00, 13:30, I stopped at the corner and walked the rest of the way. I'd done it!

I complete my mile in 14:30, and as I rounded the corner back to the house, the kids ran out and sprayed me.

It was a good day.

(Photo Used by Permission from Flickr User Sylvain Mercier. All Rights Reserved)

Plans for Soccer - I'm Coaching Two Teams! (Maybe)

Both Owen and McKenna want to do soccer next year, which is great, but they will be on different teams and they're both demanding I coach them, which is not so great. I've been talking to my wife about what I'm going to do, especially because we haven't been sure whether Owen's been serious about soccer but the paperwork came today asking me if I was going to volunteer again, so I agreed to coach both teams.

It sounds nuts. It is nuts. It was hard at the beginning coaching one team, but I enjoyed the hell out of it. I got to spend time with my friend Jeff which was awesome, spend time with my kids, and make new friends, so those were all pluses. My kids really love soccer and both are decent at it, so I want to continue to encourage their interest.

I don't even know if they'll let me coach two teams or not. Some of the other coaches have done it in the past, so it shouldn't be a big deal, and Jeff has said that he might coach this year too, so maybe I'll let him have a team and take a back seat. I don't know yet.

What I do know is I really love coaching, more than anything I can remember in a long time, and as long as I enjoy it I'm going to keep doing it. Hell, at this point, if I could get paid to do it full time I'd jump at the chance. I mean that seriously.

An Uncomfortable Silence

There was an uncomfortable silence in the room.  We were in a Mexican standoff.  His fingers tightly gripped my right nipple.  I was gripping his left nipple.

I raised one eyebrow.  "So...are you going to let go?"

"Nope!"

"I'm not letting go until you let go."

He shook his head.  "I'm not letting go!"

We looked at each other.  I narrowed my eyes at Owen.  He crinkled his nose and smiled.  His fingers pinched harder so I squeezed a little harder.  One of us was going to lose.

Suddenly my wife walked.

"WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON?"

My son jumped.  I squeezed last.  I won.

You Just Don't Understand

Friday night, as I was getting ready for bed, I turned to my wife and said "I need to get to sleep and get up before Owen."

"Why?"

"Well, if I get up before him, I get to put snow in his pants.  If he wakes up before me, he says he's going to put snow in my pants."

"What are you talking about?"

"It's a deal we made with each other."

"You are not doing tha...why would you even agree to that?"

"Honey, I think you just don't understand the intricacies of a father-son relationship."

"Yeah, I must not."

I ended up getting up before him, but no snow was put into anyone's pants.  We had a snowball fight instead.

My Little Man Is Growing Up

Today is my son's first day of preschool all on his own.  Last year when he went his sister was also in the preschool, albeit in a different class, so he felt like he wasn't totally alone.  This year, McKenna's in kindergarten and he's the big man on campus (as much as a hallway in a church can be considered a "campus") and he's not freaked out.  I am impressed.  I'm also a little overwhelmed.

He's my little man, my youngest kid, and this is his last year of preschool.  Coming out of his classroom today he just looked and talked like an older boy.  He was his own man today and it really showed.

I picked him up and we walked to the van as he told me all about his first day of school.

"I played with two boys today, but I don't know their names yet.  We won't learn any names until tomorrow.  We didn't even have any time to go on the playground, I only got to go down the slide one time and then we had to leave."

"Yeah"

"And nobody got into trouble today."
"That's good!"

"I drew a lot of pictures today.  I colored myself in.  I did a really good job, my teacher said."

"Wow!"

I put him in the van.  "Sit down little man and buckle up"

"Okay daddy.  And one boy only colored himself all yellow and the teachers had to tell him to use different colors but she said I did a really good job."

"Well I'm proud of you bubba."

And I am proud of him.  I shut the sliding door and started to climb into the van.  A tear ran down my face.  My little man is growing up.